When and how love guides us

At 22 years old, I understand that love can be a feeling difficult to define. I have always seen myself as a rational person, driven by objective data and as impartial an analysis of situations as possible.
I have always struggled to believe that there was an emotion, a feeling capable of irrationally influencing my decisions in some way.
Until today, I still haven't been able to understand how and to what extent this emotion, which I can hardly bring myself to name, affects my decisions. One thing, however, I have definitely understood... love opens or closes my eyes to aspects that I could never grasp with just reason.Today's post is not the usual post that deals with a topic I am passionate about and that I try to express and share as best as I can. Today's post is a discovery, it is a study and personal growth that I want to share with you.

Love actually guides our choices – what does science tell us?

A study conducted by Lerner et al. (2015) reveals that our choices are not guided solely by a rational process, but are strongly influenced by emotions.The model presented highlights how traditional decision-making frameworks focus only on objective factors, such as the characteristics of the decision-maker and the available options (black lines).However, research shows that the emotions we feel at the moment of choice shape our evaluations and the expectations we create about the outcomes of our choice itself (green lines).

Does this mean that love (like any other emotion) is not just an abstract feeling, but a factor that concretely shapes our decisions?
Let's delve a little deeper into our research. Neuroscience offers a fascinating perspective on how love influences our brain and, consequently, our decisions. According to a study from Harvard Medical School, Love and the Brain, love activates specific areas of the brain, including the reward system and regions involved in judgment and decision-making. This means that love can alter our perception of reality, making us more likely to ignore flaws, overestimate the benefits of a choice, or even take risks that we would normally avoid. In other words, what we feel is not just an emotional abstraction, but a biological phenomenon that modulates our decisions in one way or another.Okay, we have reached a conclusion for this first question, does love influence our decisions? YES
Okay okay, I can't say that this answer surprises me.What I am now wondering is how this mechanism guides us and whether we have, or should have, control over it.The truth is that, although we know that emotions greatly influence our decisions, it is not always clear how much control we can exert over this process. Various studies show that the brain has a great capacity to intervene and mediate the influences of emotions. However, strong emotions like anxiety, fear, or love itself become difficult to predict and control.
Love has a profound impact, and, being addictive, we often lose control over the choices made under the influence of these emotions.
Perhaps I am straying from the true objective of this post... I am focusing too much on the scientific and rational aspects of love, while in reality, this post was born for a deeper self-analysis that goes beyond mere molecules and chemical processes.

What does philosophy tell us?

Blaise Pascal "the heart has its reasons which reason does not know" there are aspects of life, particularly those related to emotions, feelings, and intuition, that cannot be fully understood or explained by logic and rationality. In other words, there are decisions, especially in the emotional realm, that do not necessarily follow rational reasoning, but are nonetheless right or meaningful to us. Just as we can fall in love with someone without knowing exactly why, we can choose one path over another without having a logical reason.
On the other hand, Friedrich Nietzsche, who does not contradict Pascal, rather warns us about the possible dangers of love. Nietzsche sees love as a powerful force, but often deceptive. He believes it can make us weak if overly idealized... He warns us against the tendency of love to create illusions about ourselves and others.At this point, after analyzing Science and Philosophy, I allow myself to give a slightly more personal opinion, shaped by my history and thoughts.

What does our SELF tell us

As mentioned earlier, I have always considered myself a rational person, and I have always tried to make my decisions based on what is the right thing to do rationally. Today, however, I realize that perhaps we need, in some way, to incorporate irrationality into the equation of reason.Today, I feel that in many situations my life could have made better decisions if I had not limited myself to rational considerations alone, but had also listened to my instincts and emotions.I still firmly believe that information and reality should be the driving forces behind our choices. However, I cannot ignore my feelings in the choices I will make from now on.If happiness is our ultimate goal... love cannot be ignored in achieving it.

What my people say: Ignacio Tellado.

Another lesson I have learned during this period of growth is the importance of listening.Thus, I chose to ask for help from a friend who has always inspired me by talking about love: Nacho.

Amor es una inmensa palabra, igual que todo aquella que abarca. Tendemos a hablar del amor pareja, olvidándonos de todos los demás. El amor a los amigos, el amor al mar. El amor al olor de una ciudad. El amor a papa y mama. A un hermano. El amor a la naturaleza, a un paisaje. A una conversación. El amor y los sentimientos son la fuerza que mueve el mundo, y aun quien piensa que no, influye en cada paso que damos.  El amor nos hace fallar, y tomar decisiones que quizás no sean las correctas. Pero si siempre hubieras tomado la decisión correcta, nunca jamás sabrías cual era la equivocada. Y quizás seguirías pensando que, eso, era amor.